You know the words to every song, you sang the lyrics with all your heart, your heart bled with every words; it’s as if Taylor Swift had read your diary open for the world to hear. The strum of her guitar as the opening tune to White Horse play brings back memories of a distant past. The way she exploded on the bridge of All Too Well, resurrects the ghost of a hundred buried feelings. The calm way she sang Treacherous puts you on a day dream, drives you crazy that you hit the gas pedal and went from zero to a hundred hours per mile.
You remember how Tim McGraw played one summer night and remember that one person you dedicated that song couple of summers back. You remember how you felt Enchanted when you first saw that person in a ball gown that made you heart beat fast. You laughed at how you made stupid decisions when you were Fifteen because you felt in love and it was magical; when you first said hello and it was magical not knowing that that hello could one day turn in to your Last Kiss. You remember after that one Friday night, you went out and got drunk and he brought you home almost wasted. He asked you to sit down on the kitchen stool as he rummage into your kitchen and made you some coffee and then Shake It Off plaid on your phone and you dance around the kitchen in the refrigerator light.
You remember how you wish that your crush likes you back and wrote on the back of your notebook “You Belong With Me”. You saw yourself barging in your crush’s first date and you wish you could ask her to say no but you kept your silence while a little voice in your head says “Speak Now!” You remember how reckless you were when you were 22, you went to every party and you saw her there dancing in the middle with her crop top, floral crown and short denim shorts and you were just like “I Knew You Were Trouble”.
And there will be moments of regrets. Moments of “I Wish You Would”. There were moments when you wish you could go back and remember what you were fighting for – a love, a friendship, whatever. Moments when you look back to lost relationships and all you could say is “All You Had To Do Was Stay.” There were moments of closing doors but you know that you are Never Ever Ever Getting Back Together.
But at the silence of your own solitude, you will always find yourself wishing you can run towards that someone, call that someone, say hello to that someone without risking another goodbye. Everytime you try, you just had stop. You just Almost Do. There will be moments when you thought you are complete but in reality you are half alive, there’s always going to be a Blank Space and you know that Everything Has Changed. That’s when you start to bargain, you started to ask her for the Last Time to put you name on top of her list. But it’s no use. And you cry yourself to sleep wishing and hoping she’s wondering about you because you are. And you know the reason for the Teardrops on Your Guitar could also be the reason for you to be on a State of Grace.
But after all these heartaches, you will find yourself renewed, Clean. You start to go out again and you just feel happy. You know you are a new you and you start to cling to that hope that one day you will find that someone who will love you in that exact same way you want. You know you will, and you will watch it Begin Again. But this time, it will be a perfect Love Story.